Fuck Off As A Service (FOAAS)

http://foaas.com/

by choult • 13 years ago

486 104 13 years ago

foaas.com

tarcon• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/off/NSA/me

cronin101• 13 years ago

So brave.

lovemenot• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/king/cronin101/tarcon

lotsofcows• 13 years ago

I think there's an extraneous parameter in /this/:from Oh, and minor niggle, you haven't replaced :from in the final three examples.

Also, please can you add localisation? The word "donut" makes me feel physically sick. http://foaas.com/you/%22donuts%22/lotsofcows

MartinMcGirk3• 13 years ago

I too feel this pain acutely, to combat it I wrote a small and VERY basic JavaScript file a while ago to change this on the fly on a webpage based on your GeoIP location. https://github.com/MartinMcGirk/English.JS

alanctgardner23• 13 years ago

The question is, which spelling do Canadians get?

MattBearman2• 13 years ago

Legendary! Always good to have an early afternoon laugh :) I shall be spreading this forthwith!

MattBearman2• 13 years ago

Also http://foaas.com/you/pay%20me/Freelancers%20Everywhere

3pt141597• 13 years ago

This isn't Hacker News material.

fredley• 13 years ago

It's a well-executed joke aimed at the Hacker community. I enjoyed it and upvoted it.

3pt141597• 13 years ago

It's a hello world rest app. There is nothing interesting about it at all.

bct• 13 years ago

Calling it a joke is a real stretch. Apparently HN is populated entirely by preteen boys who think that the word "fuck" is hilarious.

jonahx• 13 years ago

Actually, this is the epitome of HN material.

3pt141597• 13 years ago

It is not. Five years ago we didn't have this crap. There is nothing redeemable about this besides it being a hello world rest app.

barrkel4• 13 years ago

And if I was still able to flag submissions, I'd flag it.

cjfont• 13 years ago

And why can't you flag it? Is there a quota or something?

shocks• 13 years ago

Votes decide that, not you.

toyg4• 13 years ago

well, strictly speaking, pg decides that. In the current constitutional arrangement though, he (mostly) delegates his powers to the electorate.

3pt141597• 13 years ago

Communities can hold themselves to standards and people can try to convince each other that those standards are good.

It is SUPER telling that the only people that disagree with me have accounts that are younger than mine while the ones that agree with me have accounts that are older than mine.

3pt141597• 13 years ago

And look at that, it has been flagged and pulled from the homepage.

TallGuyShort• 13 years ago

Neither are comments like this

3pt141597• 13 years ago

I actually agree with you, and normally I don't post them, but this is just so fragrantly not what HN is about and yet it is almost #1.

johnjhayes• 13 years ago

My time! It's been wasted! Oh noes!

peterkelly• 13 years ago

Man, I'd love to see what would happen if you submitted this as a student project for a class on web services

nicholassmith• 13 years ago

They should put the source up somewhere, I'd love to see what the filthy minds of the hacker community could add on.

kiplinger• 13 years ago

How usefully useless

16s3• 13 years ago

Telnet is simpler... I call this my random insult service and it can run on any TCP port. It's not as rude as saying "Fuck Off" as it is meant to be humorous and is intended for all the script-kiddie port scanners out there:

    telnet 108.4.184.93

sillysaurus• 13 years ago

This is great!

In case anyone without telnet wants to see: here are 46 insults from that telnet service. http://pastebin.com/6SP2PucG

I'm partial to "Your IQ is the same as the temperature in this room. And it's cold in here."

16s3• 13 years ago

That was inspired by this Great Santini quote:

That was the man who dandled me on his knee when I was a young boy—the Great Santini. I once introduced my father when I was giving a talk like this, and I said, "My father decided to go in the Marine Corps when he found out that his IQ was the temperature of this room."

My father got up right behind me. He stared down at the audience and he said, "My God, it's hot in here. . . it must be at least 165 degrees."

Shorel2• 13 years ago

You don't have to remark about cold in most of the world.

35 centigrade degrees is very hot.

CatMtKing• 13 years ago

What if I told you I use Kelvins?

kalleboo• 13 years ago

telnet: connect to address 108.4.184.93: Operation timed out

telnet: Unable to connect to remote host

16s3• 13 years ago

ISP rotated out the IP... DHCP. I'll find a static one someplace and put it up.

Edit: This works until 3:30 PM today (East Coast USA time):

    telnet insult.16s.us

abdel• 13 years ago

i like the roadmap

binarymax• 13 years ago

Feature request:

     /shakespeare/:name/:from

returns ':name, Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch! - :from'

e.g. /shakespeare/Falstaff/Prince%20Henry returns 'Falstaff, Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch! - Prince Henry'

_dark_matter_• 13 years ago

I was thinking:

  /python/:from

returns 'Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! -:from'

Not quite as classy, though.

philip21563• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/shakespeare/Falstaff/Prince%20Henry

keninglis• 13 years ago

In the spirit of Postel's Robustness principle, please also handle Shakespeare, Shakespear, Shakspeare and Shakspere

tehwebguy• 13 years ago

License? Can't use this without one.

Narretz• 13 years ago

The "Do What the Fuck You Want to Public License" seems appropriate, in tone and language.

http://www.wtfpl.net/

peterwwillis• 13 years ago

Haha, I love that license! Somebody submitted some of my software to Debian and they wouldn't accept until I put a license on it, so I picked that one.

kfk• 13 years ago

I think you should include hashed urls. You can guess the content of the link from the url.

Tloewald• 13 years ago

Use something like this:

http://hugeurl.com/

KennyCason• 13 years ago

Wow, this just made me lol as well

maaaats• 13 years ago

Not Written in Mozart.

I thought they were talking about this mozart programming system: http://www.mozart-oz.org/ And thought to myself "who would ever write anything big in that"?

toyg4• 13 years ago

Italians (well, many of them) can use this localised version, "SAAS: Soccmel As A Service": http://soccmel.taldeg.me/

terabytest2• 13 years ago

Damn, I'm 100% Italian and don't understand half of the words in it. Gotta hate dialects.

toyg4• 13 years ago

Apologies! I probably can't speak most of them anymore either, not with a passable accent...

Dialects are one of those things emigrants like me tend to romanticise. It is true that they're an actual hindrance in many cases (in places like Veneto you're shut out of most business communities if you can't speak the local lingo) and tend to be loudly represented by the most xenophobic elements. Still, they're part and parcel of the Italian culture and reflect local history much more than the artificial Italian language itself. Bolognese, for example, still maintains traces of Napoleonic soldiers (e.g. "avec" is used in Bolognese exactly like you'd use it in French), Southern dialects have Spanish and mooresque influences, and so on.

uKV6kWT3• 13 years ago

Are code contributions welcome? If so, is there a repository I can send a patch to?

JonSkeptic• 13 years ago

Name collision!

I've been telling people to do me a service and fuck off for years!

wilhil• 13 years ago

And this has much better documentation than many APIs I have to use!

dasil003• 13 years ago

Cute. But now you're on the hook to maintain it, and I can already see the abuse you'll have to take from your target demographic whenever this goes down.

sigkill• 13 years ago

They couldn't possibly abuse him while the service is down...

DanWaterworth• 13 years ago

Maybe the target demographic will become so dependent on this service, that they'll be unable to hurl abuse without it.

unfletch• 13 years ago

When it's time to retire the service, they need only redirect everyone to http://foaas.com/off/users/FOAAS

jjsz• 13 years ago

I thought this was going to be a list of all the services who can fuck off, like AT&T and Time Warner Cable, with an API to either: launch a DDoS attack at them, formally fuck them off by sending them a letter or a proper complaint to the correct address, while connecting your social media accounts with the correct hashtags- updating your status. Telling actual _people_ to fuck off caught me off guard...then I got the joke of applying an API to everything, especially if it's easier to do it in person...You should add mailing real letters if enough people request the service.

joeblau• 13 years ago

LMAO. I just burst out laughing so hard. Why is this platform not open source :)?

devgutt2• 13 years ago

This should use POST instead of GET, because you are proposing an action.

toyg4• 13 years ago

But the messaging system is idempotent! The behaviour of 3rd-party endpoints is undetermined.

This calls for a standard! The Fuck-Off Protocol, or FOP, will soon have an rfc, a mailing list, and three incompatible implementations.

devgutt2• 13 years ago

haha, and probably at some point someone will write "FOP 2.0 and the Road to Hell"

stevewilhelm• 13 years ago

And Dave will claim to be the father of FOP.

damian2000• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/donut/HATEOAS/foaas.com

Jd• 13 years ago

Didn't zedshaw already design something like this? Where is he when you need him?

piqufoh• 13 years ago

I fucking love this.

akadien• 13 years ago

This is fantastic. It's the best thing since StarLogs (http://starlogs.net/#johnzachary/libcork)

ianstallings• 13 years ago

I'm too old for this shit.

sushaantmujoo• 13 years ago

new http 403 msg

hughdbrown• 13 years ago

Feature request

   /chainsaw/:name/:from

returns 'F*ck me gently with a chainsaw, :name. Do I look like Mother Teresa?' - :from

philip21563• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/chainsaw/Hughdbrown/Heather

haha

dcuthbertson• 13 years ago

Nicely done. It needs:

  /thanks/:from

returns 'Fuck you very much. - :from.'

zipppy• 13 years ago

My one feature request would be to have the word proceeding 'fuck' as an argument:

/:thing/:from Will return content of the form 'Fuck :thing. -:from' e.g. /SaaS/Foaas will return 'Fuck SaaS. -Foaas'

philip21563• 13 years ago

added /:thing/:from

rullopat• 13 years ago

So, GMail filters other people spam and put their own paid spam directly on inbox. Brilliant!

MrBra• 13 years ago

way to go :)

jedahan• 13 years ago

I made a few cruder services like this at my old job:

http://foaas.willfixeverything.com http://abug.in/linux

They are both running on heroku and slow as hell. Pull requests (http://github.com/jedahan) or better free hosts are welcome, but I get like 50 visits a year so whatevers.

We used in in chat rooms when management was being dumb, mostly.

djokkataja• 13 years ago

Heads up that the second link will make your phone talk rather loudly.

squid_ca• 13 years ago

For the ultimate "fuck you", this should be written to use SOAP.

boomlinde• 13 years ago

SOAP, by passing it escaped XML blobs in string containers.

ruttiger• 13 years ago

This was inevitable.

gadders• 13 years ago

Feature request:

/soldiers/:from

"Fuck this for a game of soldiers" - :from

okwa• 13 years ago

http://foaas.com/you/Nvidia/Linus%20Torvalds

andyidsinga• 13 years ago

/memeimgurl/:name

returns fo text overlaid on image

jhh• 13 years ago

when I need to be told to fuck off I just read the AGPL.

leviself• 13 years ago

Really like the site.

Feature request: Shortened URL so the surprise isn't given away.

hk__2• 13 years ago

They published the code : https://github.com/xenph/foaas

Fuck Off As A Service (FOAAS)

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