How Do you Motivate Yourself and Stay Focused?

http://www.bothsidesofthetable.com/2013/10/08/how-do-you-motivate-yourself-and-stay-focused

by peterkchen • 13 years ago

99 67 13 years ago

6d0debc071• 13 years ago

My attitude towards major decisions comes from an incident in my childhood. I make them and then see whether they stand up to the lesser tests along the way - reason and reality.

It's not willpower for me, it's not even trying to focus on something. It's making a choice and meaning it - really meaning it: I'm gonna do this, you'll have to kill me (or the idea as the case may be) to stop me. Then I've got something to work with. What that decision is at the time isn't the most important part. Try to talk yourself out of that decision - depending on the time and resources, try to get other people to talk you out of it - if you fail then do the thing, if you succeed then don't. If it gets far enough, throw the dice and accept what may come with the knowledge you gambled as well as you were able.

The important thing for me is to make that initial choice. I find that works much better than indulging in doubting a course of action that I can't really define. Hesitation is often just another word for freezing, panicking or running away.

...

Not that I think that my style of thinking is suitable for everyone. I wonder whether the sort of choice making I'm talking about here is something that everyone can do. For instance, lots of people seem to have the fear that if they get attacked they're not going to act as they want to - which doesn't really make sense if you have the experiences to know you can make a decision and mean it.

pa5tabear• 13 years ago

what was the incident?

vylan• 13 years ago

If you're near the beach, try surfing, and especially at the end of a long day of work. Not only is it great exercise, but also can be a very transformative experience. Refreshing in both the physical and mental sense. This gives me motivation and focus in other things I take on.

zobzu• 13 years ago

simple: i do other things. i take breaks. i work a healthy 35h a week or so (of actual work, not of checking imgur/facebook/reddit/emails/coffee/what not)

i think its well covered elsewhere. if spend too much time focusing on work, you'll lose that focus entirely.

bfe• 13 years ago

Elon Musk answered a similar question, and identified drive as the only relevant factor:

"How do you stay focused, motivated, and maintain enthusiasm when things don't go the way you'd hoped?

"I think my, sort of, drive to get it done is somewhat disconnected from hope, enthusiasm, or anything else... I actually just don't care about hope, or enthusiasm, motivation... I just give it everything I've got, irrespective of what the circumstances may be... You just keep going, and get it done."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOPgM7Sc2VQ

runawaybottle• 13 years ago

I love Elon Musk, but jesus christ, way to make the rest of us feel utterly human.

visakanv2• 13 years ago

I'm beginning to be convinced he has some sort of mutation, seriously

phaus3• 13 years ago

I'm impressed by his scientific endeavors, but I have a hard time forgiving him for Paypal.

PakG1• 13 years ago

Correspondingly, way to make himself sound like an utter robot. It goes both ways.

worldsayshi2• 13 years ago

I don't think that "drive" is anything mysterious at all. It's somewhat the same drive that cause people to play rpg:s for hours and hours going into weeks. Not exactly the same obviously, but related.

joelrunyon• 13 years ago

I actually just don't care about hope

I love it.

qwerta• 13 years ago

They asked Neil Armstrong what he would do, if engine on Eagle broke and there was zero chance they would return from Moon. He answered: "I would try to fix it"

scrabble• 13 years ago

I can't see anyone saying anything else.

"An engine broke and you are stuck on the moon and will die horribly. What do you do?"

Seems your options are to either accept your fate and die, or try to live.

hrktb• 13 years ago

I should disclaim english is not my primary language... but what is the fine line between 'drive' and 'motivation'?

I don't think he is really giving the deep reason why he is motivated (or driven, as you like) to get it done, he's just saying he strongly feels that he has to.

asdfologist• 13 years ago

I believe he's implying that he doesn't have to try to motivate himself, because motivation just comes naturally and effortlessly to him.

kabisote• 13 years ago

Makes sense. If you don't care about anything else but to finish what you're currently doing, you'll most probably get it done. Like if you really want to finish the film you're watching or the game you're playing or the book you're reading and you don't care about the baby crying or the phone ringing or the food burning or the burglar entering, you'll most probably get it done.

andyl• 13 years ago

This reads like a screen play. "One Million Dollars - would you take it?!?" Indecent Proposal. (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107211/)

knappador3• 13 years ago

The problem only exists if you have it. It doesn't really exists, but seems to exist if you let it exist. Ostensibly this advice seems not helpful as it doesn't solve the problem, but by not acknowledging it, the problem is solved. You can of course choose to manifest this problem as another problem that is solvable, which can mean mid-life crisis etc or whatever task you seek to be productive at.

kyro• 13 years ago

What does this even mean?

knappador3• 13 years ago

It's impossible to express or study something that is ineffable. It's like extrapolating an underlying mechanism to quantum physics. You might get a model. Your model might be consistent, but the model is never guaranteed to be true or be anything better than lucky.

Study some Daoism, Socrates, decideability, and other such intellectual resources regarding perception, conditional existence, and the possibility of solutions.

I get a high state of spirit from attacking whatever is in front of me. My progress begets progress. If I don't have progress, I start. Convolution of the topic of motivation is basically procrastination unless what you're doing is not leading you even on a meandering path to your goal, in which case you need more goals and to be involved in activities with more potential. I work on FOSS, maintain and develop FOSS, help users with the FOSS I work on, and there's no doubt that it pays off, monetarily and in terms of potential. Therefore, I am never in contact with this problem. I've worked dead-end jobs to get into financial and skill position to work high-potential jobs. Any time I'm not in such a position, I seek ways to get into such a position. The problem of motivation is rhetorical. Expecting an answer might give you one, but the existence of a problem or a solution to something that is axiomatic is a dead-end unless you get lucky and something totally outside your perception leads you to believe that you have a solution and a problem and that the two together have given you motivation.

jotm3• 13 years ago

Not really, you do run into limits imposed by your brain and no amount of ignoring the problem will help you.

The brain is an organ, so it's really kind of like you can't run forever because your muscles tire out or you can't lift a car to save your own life (even though technically both are possible)...

proee• 13 years ago

While staying focused in a startup is important, it's nice to have freedom to explore new ideas and thought processes outside of the core product.

I've seen plenty of startups hyper-focus on one product and fail because they couldn't position their product in the marketplace properly (seeing the forrest-through-the-trees).

swayvil• 13 years ago

Focus is brother to blindness, just saying.

lifeformed4• 13 years ago

I feel like I'm facing the same problems but in a completely opposite context. He's in a stressful situation every day, unsure what's going to come next, and forced to imperfectly make decisions. His strategy for motivation comes from keeping his eyes on the prize and going with the flow.

I'm in a completely stress free environment - every day blends in with the next; I can just do nothing one day and tell myself I will do it tomorrow. I'm financially stable enough to never be in a do-or-die situation. My passion for my project temporarily died somewhere after 30k lines of code. Yet, it is my dream to finish the project. I have to finish it, it's my self-designated job. But it's such a huge, abstract task, and I can just enjoy myself right now instead. There's literally no reward for working until after another year of it. It's so hard to stay focused and motivated when nothing is at stake.

sunir• 13 years ago

What if I gave you one hundred dollar bills and said this is all the money you had to spend. Once it's spent, it's spent, and you can never get any more.

How much would you spend on movie ticket? A blissful escape, sure, but you probably have other things to do with your life.

You're only going to live for maybe one hundred years at most, maybe many less. Spend your years wisely.

lifeformed4• 13 years ago

I agree, I would be super motivated if that was the case, because it would give me a concrete deadline. But it's hard to simulate desperateness, because I could always bail out (unless I gave all my money away, which isn't a good idea). It's not like I'm rich or anything, I just saved up enough money to do exactly this (work on this project full time) for a while, and yet here I am, sitting around struggling to do it.

I want to want to work hard. I just really need to learn self-discipline.

foobarbazqux• 13 years ago

Spend your years wisely.

Before you can do that you have to spend a great deal of your years to become wise.

cliffcrosland• 13 years ago

This sort of monetary risk incentive has been very useful for me. There's software to do this. Have you tried Beeminder? I've used it to force myself to build positive habits, including daily exercise and side-project progress. There have been more than a few moments where I've awakened after 11pm realizing that I'd be charged $5 if I neglected to do push-ups during the next hour. In anger, I invariably got up and did them, but now I do them without hesitation each day. Pledge some money on Beeminder, and make yourself do a certain number of focused hours of work each week on your project. Even small financial risks are surprisingly motivational: "No way I'm letting Beeminder take my $5."

udit99• 13 years ago

Have you tried releasing your project in small iterations instead of waiting for a year? Having users use the product that you're building and giving feedback on it is a motivator that works for me. Keeps reminding me __why__ I do what I do every day.

lifeformed4• 13 years ago

Unfortunately, I can't really do that, due to the nature of the project. It's a game, and I'm building complex part of the engine, and it won't be interesting all until this giant chunk is complete. I have friends that I work with who motivate me, but we all had to move to opposite ends of the world for unrelated reasons, and so now we're working remotely.

mattschmulen• 13 years ago

cool story bro ... I stay motivated because if I'm not I will lose my job. this is a good attitude because: 1. If you work at a high performing corp the bar is set high and its a non trivial task to just keep ahead of losing your job. 2. Reminds you its a job, and your #1 job at any job is to do a good job. 3. If your not pushing to do better at your #1 job then its time to focus on your #2 Job, which is find a better job..

shubb• 13 years ago

That's kinda irrational. Your employer is expecting a certain return on your wages, and your job is to make that return. Anything past that is a bonus from their perspective, and might get a reward.

If you are making an adequate return, but someone else might be able to make a better one, they will instead shuffle you into work where doing extra good doesn't generate much extra return. No sane employer fires good employees for not being exceptional.

(If you are working at an unpleasant cull the bottom 10% type place, that's a pretty low bar)

dools• 13 years ago

Get some customers. If you can't get customers, get backers.

nephorider• 13 years ago

I usually go down through the "down to to do list way". This gives me a frame for working, and allows me to be in the state of mind of "this is a job, you signed for it, you do it"More than often some joy of working appears a few times after the struggling

matwood• 13 years ago

When I rest I feel utterly lifeless except that my throat burns when I draw breath...I can scarcely go on. No despair, no happiness, no anxiety. I have not lost the mastery of my feelings, there are actually no more feelings. I consist only of will. - Messner on the first solo ascent of Everest

There is no secret, it is willpower. Every person draws willpower from their own unique place. Find yours.

mzarate06• 13 years ago

I only work on projects I have a deep interest or passion for. Nothing kills motivation more than non-interesting work. A close second is ensuring you're on a great team.

I agree w/other comments that taking breaks helps, but I haven't found that to be as important as those two (passion and team). You can take as many breaks as you want throughout the day, but if you're stuck having to return to non-interesting work or a team you'd rather not work with, you'll still find it hard to get motivated and maintain focus.

mindcrime• 13 years ago

How do I motivate myself? That's kinda hard to explain. It involves a lot of inner demons and mindsets that date to my childhood growing up dirt-poor in rural southeastern NC. But what it boils down to lately it this: I'm 40. I'm not getting any younger. I haven't yet accomplished my most outlandish dreams. And I have never been crazy about accepting mediocrity. I don't want to live an average, boring, moderately successful life. "Go big or go home", whatever.

So, for the past two years or so, my mindset has been "I'm basically out of 'at bats'. I don't get any more chances to make my dreams come true. I do this now, or I load my car with booze, drive to Vegas, and pull a 'Leaving Las Vegas' routine."

I just hope I can find a girl who looks like Elisabeth Shue. I <3 Elisabeth Shue.

I also draw a lot of inspiration from music. Since Suster started the Eminem references, here's one of my favorites:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1xXYeNrW9k ('Till I Collapse - Eminem & Nate Dogg)

Along with stuff like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQQcOQsCFnw (Keep Your Eye on the Money - Motley Crue)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gnJ-fQ1uwA (Stick To Your Guns - Bon Jovi)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=liZKm86wW88 (Never Say Die - Jon Bon Jovi)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3MXiTeH_Pg (Here I Go Again - Whitesnake)

Of course, you have to realize, I grew up in the 80's, in the era of the "80's feel good movie" where the underdog hero has his back to the wall, all the odds against him, and through hard work, dedication, (and a training montage, of course) ultimately perseveres and triumphs over evil. Those are the kind of metaphors that are pretty deeply lodged into my psyche.

It also helps that I simply enjoy the act of creating things, and right now, my goal is to create this company that I have in my head. I see what we're capable of building and where this can go, and I want to make that happen.

Even more difficult. You have an offer to sell your company. Should you? You might net $1 million and that would change your life. But everybody is telling you not to sell and instead to “go for it” and you don’t know whom to listen to. One. Million. Dollars. I know it’s not what it used to be, but news flash – it’s still a million dollars! How can you wake up every day and process that decision. Five million? Ten?

This reminds me of the (in)famous "An acquistion is always a failure" discussion[1]. I said what I have to say[2] about this, in that thread.

[1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5483582

[2] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5483765

vladmk• 13 years ago

I'll take a crack at the problem. What motivated me to lose 10 pounds, was a bet I made with my brother. I told him if I don't do Insanity (workout program) everyday I'd take a picture with myself in a dress. Now he was holding me responsible and I had this negativity driving me. I finished the full program.

I just did a similar thing with my co-founder for my start up except with cold calling. We've broken our sales record this week. Bottom line I think negativity motivates me more personally than positivity. Lastly whatever it is, try to make that a habit, so you have to force yourself to do it at the exact same time and place. (my two cents).

protez• 13 years ago

I'm so tired of seeing motivation hacks, or similar stuff. If something supposed to motivate you doesn't motivate you enough, that supposition is just plain weak and has no deeper place within you. That's it. Be yourself. That's the ultimate motivation. Nothing else can be motivating you more than that, and shouldn't be, unless you want to be someone else, or as hollow as possible.

adamzerner• 13 years ago

Like this: http://www.collegeanswerz.com/discipline-and-understanding.

warcher2• 13 years ago

I don't do too good with 'motivation' or willpower. I do good with habit. For me, motivation dies and willpower fails. Most of the shit that worked out well for me is stuff that I just kept with.

We had a real good day at the office, I wanna say, Tuesday? After a string of really good days. And I had to physically stop everybody and go get a couple beers from the corner store and HAND them to people to celebrate our rad success. Because it was boring. It honestly was. We do what we do every day, and sometimes we get the bear and sometimes the bear gets us, but if we work hard enough we live another day, and eventually small stupid wins pile up.

Malician• 13 years ago

I love your post. Not just because the Weeds reference made me laugh, but because not all of us are living a lifestyle far and above everyone else.

Because some of us have trouble going on every day, but we have to give it everything we have - or, at least, we know that's what we need to do to progress beyond where we are - and it's motivational to know that even people who aren't Success Factor Superhuman Outliers 10X Winner Ass-Kickers are out there, too.

warcher2• 13 years ago

I could make an equally compelling argument for being both an ultra 10x super ass kicker and a total loser. It depends on the day, really. I'm probably having an ass kicker week this week. It's difficult to be certain, as keeping the ups and downs from affecting you personally is a survival skill, and what happened this week is a factor of a bunch of shit I did months ago, and what I focus on today won't matter for months into the future. Because of this weird time distortion, the only way I can function personally is just showing up and going at a sustainable pace for a long, long time.

But it is very elon musk "don't believe in hope". If getting shit done was contingent on things working out according to plan I'd have quit years ago.

netmute• 13 years ago

Staying motivated is simple: don't work on boring shit.

That may sound like a shallow phrase, but I've been there. You've convinced yourself that you're working on the most awesome thing in the world. You keep thinking that you're supposed to be motivated, because what you're doing is great. But deep down, you know that you'd rather do something else.

At that point it usually boils down to rewards. Is the reward worth continuing?

If the answer is yes, go on. Shouldn't be a problem. If the answer is no, you know why you aren't motivated. Drop it, look for something else.

jotm3• 13 years ago

But it's not that simple. Not that simple to drop something when it's 70% complete, not easy to find something new that won't also become boring at 70%, and not easy to start from scratch.

Plus, with every failure, you lose a little bit of trust in yourself and belief that you can get things done.

There's always a point where the motivation is just gone and you have to push through somehow, and if you can't get this thing done, chances are that you won't be able to do it the second or third time, either ...

evacuationdrill• 13 years ago

Thinking of the reward is important, since the further out it seems, the less it seems to impact people.

http://lesswrong.com/lw/9wr/my_algorithm_for_beating_procras...

TausAmmer• 13 years ago

You make up story or illusion. Else, living under bridge and staring at running water gives the same satisfaction.

How Do you Motivate Yourself and Stay Focused?

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