jpxxx

I can put up with your smug, cowardly, evil war nerd horseshit, but not when it's from a throwaway.

Fuck you, fuck this encroaching Reddit-flavored nonsense, thank you HN, and goodbye HN.

Hi, future generations!

Political prisoners are being raped with food intubators to prevent themselves from committing suicide in America's secret torture prison, with the express consent and approval of President Obama, the American Congress, and the numerical majority of the American people.

Love, 2013

Tetris requires a properly sized view and clear, effortlessly distinguishable artwork.

MUDs require a quality typeface, proper layout, and appropriate coloring.

Pacman would be nothing without its remarkable low-fi charm.

Letterpress wouldn't have gathered a moment's attention if the tiles weren't immaculate and well rendered.

Graphical quality matters in everything, everything, everything visual. And it's a reasonably reliable proxy for how much effort has been put into the rest of the game.

Iraq, more or less.

Ok, nevermind on the siting bit, the paper is drafting on her PHD thesis which presumably supports the argument that these ants mounds correlate with faults.

This overseas reblog of a pop science blog which co-blogged a piece from @beckyoskin working for a blogring does not pass the smell test. At the very least, the headline is garbage.

There is no link to the source (here: http://www.mdpi.com/2076-2615/3/1/63/pdf), no supporting material presented, it makes some odd claims starting with "ants prefer to live on active faults" (this paper says nothing about that - it's talking about ants that happen to be found in a geologically interesting faulting area) and ends up with "ants can predict earthquakes". Which then goes up to the headline.

Stop stop stop stop stop.

This paper is a decent exploration of performing day+night video analysis to describe above-ground ant behavior over large periods. The rest of it seems reaching and improbable, but I don't have the background to comment on any of the math or geology presented.

For a tolerant, civil, agreeable collection of intelligent human beings who are interested in perusing anti-global warming literature while taking your throbbing martyr complex into nuanced account at every step of the way, please navigate to about:blank. It loads a hell of a lot faster than HN.

Basically, PCs are dumb, boring work terminals for old people.

Children coming of computing age when the iPhone was released are now 9 years old, perhaps on their second or third portable gaming device, and lobbying their parents for an iPhone.

What on Earth would they possibly want a slow, dirty, heavy keyboard computer for? You can't even take a picture with it unless it's an Apple.

Boo, hiss. Taking marketing at face value is holding a weed whacker by the wrong end.

It feels that way to me, and I can recall four or five disruptions in the last year.

It's rather frustrating when the core functionality for a quarter billion phones stops working on a monthly basis. But at least I can now understand the hot tears generated when BBM would go down; over-the-top messaging with delivery/read/syndication truly is superior to SMS.

Just to put a needle fine point on it: Wal-Mart has "always low prices"... for your area.

Their data mining lets them know exactly what to price Household Paper Products in your zip code so that they're always lower than the surrounding competition while not leaving money on the table. They're not targeting the lowest possible price system-wide.

I dunno. Maybe ten years around Steve Ballmer terminally fucked him up.

The fundamental problem is that his post was targeted at the 10,000 industry and customer elite, none of whom feel like giving the Titan much respect because nobody fundamentally likes the #1 guy.

Who he should have been writing to were the 350M people he claims to support. When you're selling sweet-smelling electronic vapor, you use sweet-smelling words to gently remind people that comparing a videogame developer to ACTUAL HITLER is insane and insulting. That a substantial portion of the market is composed of profound assholes is beyond the point.

You don't play at their level, you don't speak at their level, and you don't engage in CEO Ego-battle 3000X. It's just fucking videogames.

Their true customer is a 15 year old girl playing Simpsons on her Samsung. He should be writing to her.

Christ, what an asshole.

"An annual web poll shows that once again, Electronic Arts will be named the "Worst Company in America".

We at EA understand that we provide a lightning rod for many in an industry that has undergone massive change and experienced a great deal of consolidation. We've acquired beloved game developers, we've put storied franchises to rest, and we've sheparded evolutions in gameplay and game design that have been met with skepticism and rejection.

But please believe, we're on the player's side.

Tens of thousands of EA employees show up to work every day to create incredible new experiences and polish fantastic new things that the world has never seen.

You, your family, and your friends entrust us with time, attention, and money in return for fantastic experiences with characters you love and places that are realer than real. It's an honor to work in this industry.

We love these shared stories and adventures, and truly understand what makes videogaming special to hundreds of millions of people every day.

That said, we are a business, and all businessess will make mistakes, fail to meet expectations, and poorly communicate. We're no different.

XXX EXAMPLES XXX

Videogames are unique in that the business environment changes more in six months than most other industries change in decades, and we've struggled to adapt to the new realities just like hundreds of other videogame developers.

We feel it's essential that we have an online content distribution system of our own, called Origin. It's clear that we've fallen painfully short of industry standards in terms of technical execution and customer service, and we most certainly are not meeting our own expectations.

XXX INSERT HONEST FIXES HERE XXX

We also feel that we're failing to incorporate our customer's frustrations, concerns, and desires into the development of our franchises. When some player were disappointed with Mass Effect 3, they had nowhere to voice their opinions where they felt they would be heard.

Thus, as of this week we will be employing ombudsmen for each of our major franchises. They'll be superfans who know the games inside and out, and their sole responsibility will be to communicate with you about what's happening with the development and care of your favorite series and franchises.

FIFA - @Matthiew Mass Effect - @Jennifer SIMCITY - @Alyssa

XXX ETCETERA XXX

Feel free to vent, praise, be angry, you name it. They'll be listening. But always be respectful. We're here to have a good time together.

Finally, we understand that server shutdowns are a necessary part of the life of any game. No party goes on forever. But we don't want to shut off the lights too early, and we don't want customers to wonder how long the game they've just purchased will be fully functional and connected.

So today we're instituting a 3 year server guarantee on every network-aware and network-based videogame we sell. You can purchase an EA game and rest assured that you'll have friends to go on adventures with for a long long time.

For what we've failed in, we are truly sorry. We strive to delight one and all, but we can never be perfect. For those who feel we can never do right, you'll find dozens of other talented studios who you can have a more fruitful relationship with.

We don't feel there's any shame in being #1, but we do feel there's a great responsibility in it.

Let us bring you the best games on Earth, tell us plainly and clearly when we're not meeting that expectation, and let's all have fun together.

- EA CEO WHATEVER"

I wrote this in literally twelve fucking minutes. What a prick.

No? Unless I'm utterly missing something, the thrust of this design is that it doesn't require tracking at all.

Rather, it doesn't require tracking -and- it's a concentrating design.

Wrong, stop, I can personally name forty people working on it right now. Cancer is not a single thing, and progress is made on every front, every day.

Hrm, I agree with what you said. I overreacted. Wiping my comment.

Hrm, they label it as "iOS and UX to Windows porting labs". So in a sense.

Haha, true. But it's a whole lot better than "Buy shitty VM product, then source a retail/whitebox copy of Windows, then Install and Patch, Install and Patch, and set up Dev tools for about $400."

Yes it really is a mistake, and you're being obnoxious. Please stop.

Ya, but look at it from a pragmatic business perspective, and this is Microsoft doing exactly what they should to court the prodigal developer: set up a zero hassle Windows environment on your favorite platform for cheap.

Boots stamping on faces forever, also it'll be really goddamn hot. Next.

Oh! I take that back, thank you.

Mmm. sips tea

Anyway, to the best of my knowledge, the jailbreak-detection system mentioned here[1] was removed as of iOS 5.

[1] http://arstechnica.com/apple/2011/02/ibooks-to-jailbreakers-...

Because that'd require hauling in 200 vehicles to replace a $10,000 battery pack while tying up maintenance bays, disrupting production to source and ship 60kWh packs, and incur a multi-million dollar charge on a company that is barely breaking even.

(edit: Also, rich people tend to be of a type that go absolutely apeshit when they feel they've been cheated, meta-cheated, vapor-cheated or insufficiently cheated by having to reconsider the value of a prior purchase)

Yeah, the AAA franchises are doing great, but they're still part of a stagnant market that's selling into a market that doesn't see the value in what they consume.

Apple would need to spend a fortune in hardware costs just to enable the current expectations of AAA titles, and even then they wouldn't be bringing anything to the table that Sony and MS aren't already.

Aw, sad. I'd have bought it. Ouya then!

Well, we can all agree that the $69.99 title-in-a-box model has reached something like saturation, yes? There's no reason to believe anyone wants to enter this market, least of all Apple which years ago lost the knack for selling software titles at $25+.

I think the future of consoles depends a lot upon how large the exploding Freemium/Recurring models can grow. That pie is growing, and there's no reason to believe it can't work in the living room as well as it does in the pocket.

So my argument is that Apple can have the biggest slice if they want it, and that that slice alone may be worth more than Consoles As We Know Them.

If I may repurpose an old comment of mine:

"The console industry used to sell high-end wedding cakes. Now they sell wedding cakes, some sheet cakes, and occasionally a pre-boxed slice if there are leftovers. These are your only options for snacking in the living room. You order a wedding cake, go pick it up in a few days, and hope it tastes good.

They are about to find out what happens when piping hot cookies are hand-delivered in 30 seconds or less to the living room, for free.

The only thing Microsoft, Sony, and Nintendo have going for them right now is that the iPhone and iPad are drawing away virtually all of Apple's not-inconsiderable attention.

Here's how it will work: Apple will release a $99 controller. It'll look like a SNES controller mated with an iPhone 3GS: 4" standard-resolution multitouch screen, D-pad, four buttons, two shoulder buttons, and a Lightning port. (Inside is NOBODY CARES. gyro, bluetooth, Wifi, iOS SOC, battery.) And, naturally, it will be the least embarrassing looking item in your living room.

You'll take it out of the box, type in your Wifi password, log in to iCloud, and THAT IS IT.

The Apple TV (of which there are millions already installed) leaps into action. All the plumbing is silently set up, the App Store icon appears, a free showpiece game immediately offers to install itself, and Apple connects a half billion users to the television overnight.

Most of the Wii U's best controller ideas are co-opted, the overall controller complexity is a scant third of anyone else's, it retains all the power of touch controls, it requires no complicated setup whatsoever, all the game state is cloud-backed, dozens of touch-resistant game genres suddenly find a home in the lowest-walled garden of any shipping console, customers can add more controllers if desired, and the whole panoply of mobile software can infiltrate the last screen standing.

The Apple TV is a freaking trojan horse, if Apple wants it to be. Nobody else has the UX to stave them off, or the ability to hit the price points Apple can, or their sheer distribution power, or their sheer brand power, or anything.

Free cookies. Not nut-and-raisin filled wedding cakes. Which one is your kid going to reach for?"

Troll. But just in case you're not permanently damaged yet:

Imagine you're invited to a party where you are the oldest, fattest, least appealing person there, and you're not particularly made to feel welcome.

Now imagine you're expected to attend dozens of these parties in the course of your employment.

Now imagine that these parties are intentionally arranged this way, and that the pretty people are paid to be there for the express purpose of making you look and feel old, fat, shabby, and unwelcome.

Does this compute? Does it seem fun?