Poll: Do you feel lonely?

I've often felt that in a physical world there is always separation between people. Heaven to me is unification with God and others; a oneness. Thanks for reading this far, now you can downvote me.

krmmalik3• 13 years ago

I realise that atheism is probably the fastest growing belief system around the world now and that any mention of God often gets a double-take but having to apologise for it just strikes me as odd.

I really resonated with what you said.

fakeaccountobv• 13 years ago

All the time. Not because there aren't people around, but because few people I meet in RL really get what it means to be an entrepreneur and what drives one. I just don't relate to most people's motivations and most people don't relate to mine.

Fake account because here's my secret to curing any and all loneliness: LSD. Not at all joking.

benched• 13 years ago

Loneliness is the bane of my entire existence. My biggest, life-long source of dissatisfaction with life itself.

aamar• 13 years ago

Is loneliness the immediate problem? Or is it a failure of an anticipated solution to a different problem?

krmmalik3• 13 years ago

Mine too, until I decided to do something about it 2 weeks ago. Really happy now.

coralreef• 13 years ago

Social life is probably the biggest imbalance in my life.

I'm an independent developer, so my passive income allows me to live a lifestyle of my choosing. I get to choose the projects I want to work on, choose what I want to learn, choose when I sleep/work/exercise and how often.

However I haven't gone out with friends in something like 4 years. Its not that I don't want to, I guess I have social anxiety. You say no a few times, they stop asking, and time and distance just drift relationships apart.

I feel really envious of friendships on TV shows - the idea of a tight knit group of friends who are there for each other and get into shenanigans. It seems like that's how your suppose to live, but I haven't had more than a few friends in one room since college.

Friterie• 13 years ago

Stating the obvious but it will never happen if you don't do anything about it.. As a developer meetups and hackerspaces could be a great way to start. It worked for me. Turning up the first time is the hardest. It's still difficult after that but it's a little easier each time until finally it's a pleasure most of the time.

prezjordan• 13 years ago

You say no a few times, they stop asking, and time and distance just drift relationships apart.

I've been on both sides of this, and I've found that when I get a few "no"s from someone I'm fairly close to, I can't help but think they don't like me - even though from experience their "no"s might just come from their anxiety. There's simply no way to tell - and it stinks for both parties.

krmmalik3• 13 years ago

I spent a long time working on a business that completely consumed me. It was remote IT support so i spent 90% of my time indoors behind my computer desk. It was 24/7 support so most of the time, i just couldn't go out.

After a few years I didn't even notice that I hadn't been out in so long and the social anxiety creeped in very slowly. Just as bad was the fact that getting up and dresses early in the morning - say into a suit - and then commuting for even just say 30mins seems like a mammoth task. I realise it's all psychological but it's been there for a long time.

I kmow exactly how you feel; same with the envy of the friendship of tight knit groups.

For the benefit of my social life, my work now isn't much better either. I'm in a rather specific niche and operate as a lone ranger. I love what I do as a vocation but it i'm sure it hurts my social life one way or another.

Nonetheless, I've had to force myself to move to a major city. I make sure I work outside of home at least 3x a week. I try to make sure at least 30% of my clients are those I meet in person and not just remote clients (though i love my remote clients. theyre so much fun) - and i'm forcing myself to meet new people every week.

I literally just got back from a conference and met a few people and tomorrow i'm meeting someone new too.

I really regret not working this into my life sooner. I feel as if i haven't lived. True story.

Poll: Do you feel lonely?

Related Stories