Actions That Made Me Happier

http://www.garyharan.com/2010/04/04/5-actions-that-made-me-happier.html

by macournoyer_ • 16 years ago

155 49 16 years ago

hcatlin• 16 years ago

I'm proud to say I've done all of these. I think the "drink with co-workers" is a super-good point and I wish more people were more honest about it!

xox3• 16 years ago

I understand the logic about the strategic importance of drinking with coworkers but I have always felt it imposed some kind of obligation that I was somewhat uncomfortable about while I was single but much more so since I got married. The burden of the obligation for me is such that it outweighs any benefits I feel it could have in relation to my happiness. Those times when I have gone out with coworkers it has produced rigid conversations bound by convention and politics - not much different from what happens in the office. So I would say that piece of advice should be examined on a case-by-case basis.

TheSOB882• 16 years ago

Maybe that's indicative of a larger culture problem at your company. I can't really see people at a bar talking about politics - are you sure you drank enough?

_h4xr2• 16 years ago

Then you're not drinking enough.

Seriously.

Alcohol is a great evolutionary adaptation, since it allows people to be extremely dour and responsible most of the time, while being able to loosen up with chemical assistance. Countries that are known for their seriousness and work ethic often have a strong drinking culture (e.g. Germany, Japan). There's a Steve Sailer article about this; I can't find it, and the domain is auto-killed upon submission anyway.

Tichy3• 16 years ago

Maybe you are taking too many steps at once. A first step could be getting a job where you actually like your coworkers enough to actually enjoy going for a drink with them occasionally.

cgs• 16 years ago

The cultural norm, at least in the US, is to make friends at work. I like my coworkers and teammates, but after spending 8 hours with any group of people, I just want to chill at home. I think sometimes my teammates wonder why I don't always go to team outings; I like to spend the 5 hours I have after work w/ my girlfriend, or hobbies. I think some people just don't have any kind of social life outside of work, so that's where they do their socializing.

nickpp• 16 years ago

Holly non-cleartype fonts, my eyes are bleeding!

Why, oh why are people so cruel, so uncaring, so unkind?

Goosey• 16 years ago

http://lab.arc90.com/experiments/readability/

sketerpot2• 16 years ago

No matter how many times this is posted, I can't upvote it enough.

dazmax• 16 years ago

In the "removing small frustrations" category: getting a second power cord for my laptop. It makes me happy twice a day when I don't have to fish my cord out to bring it to work/home.

stretchwithme• 16 years ago

that is a pain in the ass.

having one just for home, maybe I can attach it to my lapdesk and reduce the wear and tear.

Tichy3• 16 years ago

I would probably not stop at the power cord. Why not get a second laptop?

Though syncing stuff might be a pain, depending on the nature of your work. Source code might be easy to share with git.

TheSOB882• 16 years ago

So, basically two extra-light desktops? Is this satire?

lotharbot• 16 years ago

More generally speaking: set up the right infrastructure and own the right tools for common tasks. If you can save yourself a few minutes and a bit of frustration every day for a ten dollar investment or for a bit of effort once, it's worth it!

Some examples: - owning extra power cords, batteries, memory cards, etc. for electronic devices - setting up a power strip and various charging or connecting cables where they're easy to reach (consider the recently-circulated pic of the cables clipped to the edge of the desk.) - own the right cooking utensils, pots, pans, maybe a slow cooker or rice steamer, and so on. There's no sense in frustrating yourself day after day because it's harder than it needs to be to make dinner. - have appropriately-sized and located garbage cans, recycling bins, clothes hampers, toy boxes, file cabinets, and other types of containers. - repair or replace broken stuff that regularly causes annoyance, like sticky file cabinet drawers.

colonelxc• 16 years ago

As dazmax said, not only is it removing frustration, it actually can make you more happy every time you realize you don't have to pack up your cord. This probably mostly applies to people who are used to having to pack up cords a couple times a day to move around.

xexers• 16 years ago

Thanks, there are a lot of good suggestions here!

imgabe• 16 years ago

Getting a second usb cable for my iPhone had the same effect for me. One stays plugged into the wall with the charger, one stays by the laptop for syncing. Life is great.

viggity• 16 years ago

The joy of having a Zune cable at all 5 of my computers is awesome - I got all of them at monoprice.com for under ten bucks - I LOVE that website!!

SteD• 16 years ago

A docking station + a 19" monitor works great for me both at work and at home.

sabat2• 16 years ago

Makes me want to go to one of the SV/SF Hackers and Founders meetups.

On drinking with co-workers: point taken, but if you are actually having mood problems, watch the alcohol intake. It's a depressant.

timcederman2• 16 years ago

You're thinking of the wrong definition of "depressant". Alcohol is a physical depressant.

euccastro• 16 years ago

FWIW, I get a very noticeable mood depression the day after I drink, even if I do it moderately enough that I don't have any other hangover symptoms.

sabat2• 16 years ago

It's a psychological depressant as well.

pasbesoin• 16 years ago

I had the pleasure of spending a week with a group of techies in Montreal (referenced in the post). Definitely a nice and interesting crowd to hang out with (and have a drink with (which did NOT == get blitzed)). Once I read Montreal, that part clicked a bit more. The value and pleasure in such does depend on the crowd and attitudes. Back here and at the corporate job, having drinks has usually been about awkwardly commenting on the attractive women (even in mixed company), an in depth analysis of some fellow's paintball games and season, movies movies movies (but only Hollywood blockbusters and comedies), and wondering when the next bit of shit would hit the fan at the office. Straying from these points often seems risky; people are not too open -- as/in a group -- to alternatives and everyone is at least partially watching their back.

I very much like the point about 'removing small frustrations'. So often, the temptation is to pass the opportunity by, perhaps because it is small compared to everything else we are worrying about. But add it up, over a year or two, or take them all as a set, and the cumulative effect is quite significant. The satisfaction of addressing even one is a real, immediate boost and sense of accomplishment.

Finally, to return to the drinking. I find, especially as I get older, that I enjoy a cup or two of coffee in a cafe as much or more than a drink in a bar. The caffeine elevates dopamine and thereby seems to open up conversation, but the results tend to be more interesting and don't culminate in a hang-over.

wallflower• 16 years ago

Yes, since alcohol is a depressant, if you want someone to indirectly associate you with being stimulated, coffee.

zackattack3• 16 years ago

Dude that's genius. I never thought of it in that way before.

delano• 16 years ago

Ya Montreal has a great night life. It's really easy to have fun and talk to new people.

nw• 16 years ago

A great and somewhat related article by David Brooks: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/30/opinion/30brooks.html

From the article:

"... economic and professional success exists on the surface of life, and that they emerge out of interpersonal relationships, which are much deeper and more important."

jazzdev• 16 years ago

Yeah, good article. Thanks for the link. I liked this statement from article:

"Most governments release a ton of data on economic trends but not enough on trust and other social conditions. In short, modern societies have developed vast institutions oriented around the things that are easy to count, not around the things that matter most."

kalid4• 16 years ago

I like the phrasing of the title, i.e. keeping track of what actually works.

One tip that's helped me: when something makes you feel good, add it to feelgood.txt. Over time, you'll start to see patterns (vs. the random, fallible memories/ideas we have about what makes us happy).

Every few days or so I'll have a random entry [7/23/09: felt good to chill with Andreas. played games, chatted, had bfast, etc. hospitality. nice to catch up. 7/15/09: Felt good to 1) post to BE and 2) exercise today].

Looking back, I can see what actually worked in making me happy.

quickpost• 16 years ago

I like that. A lot.

I'm going to create a feelgood.txt on my work computer right now. I'm also thinking about creating a feelbad.txt - so I know what to avoid in my life.

zackattack3• 16 years ago

The flip side of this is it can be very hard to make changes in your life when you realize that people to whom you may be very close .. are no longer good for you.

kalid4• 16 years ago

Awesome, I didn't even think about having a feelbad.txt list! I might need to do that too, attacking the problem from both sides.

thirdstation• 16 years ago

Great idea! I made a remember-mode template for emacs so I can store happy thoughts whenever they occur.

If you use org-mode and remember-mode you can add this template to your org-remember-templates: ("Happy Thought" ?h "* %U %?" "~/happy.org" "Happy Thoughts")

Doing so made me happy, so I added it to the file, which in-turn produced happiness. Ahhh, recursive happiness.

kalid4• 16 years ago

Ah, I've recently switched to vim so I can't reap the benefits :).

I have contemplated geeking out and tagging these entries [blog] [exercise] and similar, so I could later analyze what areas give me the most satisfaction. But that's too much -- it's enjoyable just browsing through vs. letting grep do all the work.

chime• 16 years ago

I have something very much like your feelgood idea. I made a tab for myself on http://bulletxt.com where I record all the things that I like to do and every now and then, I look at it to find out what else to do. Currently on my list: kayaking, Scrabble, comedy club, and theme parks.

kalid4• 16 years ago

Nice, I have a "Funstuff" list which are things I like to do: drawing, karate, acoustic guitar listening...

It's funny how we need to write these down, but we do. Off the top of my head I can "forget" that I like to draw when I'm bored. In a similar way, sometimes we have to "remember" what makes us happy.

davidedicillo• 16 years ago

I can only agree with these points. I experienced all of them myself.

Actions That Made Me Happier

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