How to say nothing in 500 words

http://www.apostate.com/how-say-nothing-500-words

by jonp • 17 years ago

71 18 17 years ago

apostate.com

Eliezer• 17 years ago

Rule 1: Find subject matter that actually is interesting.

Rule 2: Find subject matter that the reader doesn't already know about.

There. Your job just got 300% easier.

pmichaud• 17 years ago

Not 305%?

decode2• 17 years ago

On the one hand, the linked essay is addressing a restrictive situation: sometimes you are asked to write on a particular subject for a particular audience, and you don't have a choice. This can happen in the classroom, on the job, or at a family reunion. It's a useful skill to be able to write well in that situation.

On the other hand, the linked essay gives the same advice you do. If you're given a topic you find boring, find something about it that's interesting. If you're writing for an informed reader, write something even the informed reader hasn't seen before.

mmt2• 17 years ago

It's a useful skill to be able to write well in that situation.

I guess I'm of a class of people who disagree with this assertion. My counter-assertion is that all contrived writing is a waste of time, both for the writer and a reader.

Early in school, I had a tendency to procrastinate such assignments. What I found useful from these experiences was recognizing the fundamental distastefulness early and giving myself permission simply not to do it. One always has a choice.

Semiapies• 17 years ago

As someone once said, "Omit needless words!"

tpyo• 17 years ago

"Omit needless words!"

bigbang• 17 years ago

epe• 17 years ago

The second half reminds me of one of my all-time favorite pieces of writing advice, Orwell's Politics and the English Language:

http://www.mtholyoke.edu/acad/intrel/orwell46.htm

gkoberger• 17 years ago

I found it odd that there was no conclusion or summary- it just ended. It was a great read with a lot of great advice, however I felt it ended in an anticlimactic way.

astine• 17 years ago

I thought the end was clever.

gridspy• 17 years ago

F, Lacks Conclusion, See me

youngian2• 17 years ago

The tragic part is that our schooling system often punishes the creative, rich writing the author advocates. The good teachers may recognize it and reward it, but the bad teachers will just take points off because you are "missing an introductory paragraph."

This is why standardized writing tests hold a special place in my bitter heart - they codify the fear of deviation and require you to spew mediocre crap - as long as it's mediocre crap spelled correctly with a topic sentence in each paragraph.

messel• 17 years ago

I needed this article as a daily blogger. Thanks for the save. I'm a terribly abstract, generalist. I'm surprised more readers haven't gouged their eyes out after reading my work.

youngian2• 17 years ago

Hi, my name is Ian, and I don't always omit needless words. I'm so sorry.

mrshoe• 17 years ago

Don't miss George Orwell's take on this subject:

http://www.mtholyoke.edu/acad/intrel/orwell46.htm

est• 17 years ago

There's a term in Chinese to describe this, it's called 八股文

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eight-legged_essay

The funny part is, it's invented about the same time as English language :)

How to say nothing in 500 words

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