tavro

My answer may not be of great help, but if you are struggling with this I would really encourage you to move to a completely different environment (i.e. Latin America) where the norms are different. In my opinion this is not something an individual can easily solve. It's a cultural issue. Culture can take a lifetime / generation to change and that's if the people collectively decide it's worth changing.

i am not really struggling with it, i am fortunate enough to already have a lot of good friends. but i do see where you are coming from. it might partly be a cultural thing on my end as well. i went to latin america last year, and the way people approach social interaction there felt much closer to what i am looking for. the more introverted scandinavian vibe can also be really nice at times. i think what i am actually trying to figure out is how not to be a “typical swede” socially, rather than simply trying to make more friends. the main reason i posted this was out of curiosity, how other people approach this, and maybe the discussion can help others (and myself) along the way.

If we get real, the loneliness epidemic is something we foisted on ourselves. Striving to avoid any awkwardness or discomfort is precisely why social life is so sterile these days. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

you might have a point there. maybe we should challenge ourselves more socially and be more open to awkwardness and discomfort. :o)

You might receive a lot of well-intended advice that does not take into account the social context of Scandinavia, which is a particularly hard nut to crack when it comes to casual conversations with people you don't know.

preach -- agreed!

One I have found is sports, this winter I've had casual chats with about 80% of the people I come across at my local ski trails. But it's mostly at the starting point or at the car park, not while you're training. Another one is regular organised activities, e.g. check out your local friluftsfrämjandet, or activities around specific interests and hobbies, and show up somewhat consistently. Every kommun will typically have a registry of local clubs on their website, it's called a föreningsregister, read through it and see if something strikes your fancy.

thanks, this is great advice! i will make sure to check it out. i actually tried something similar recently. the thing is, i often end up doing these kinds of activities with my current friends, which naturally reduces my incentive to approach new people. that is not a bad thing, of course, but it does mean i am not really meeting anyone new. maybe i should try going to some activities on my own and see what happens.

Luckily, as foreigners, we typically get a bit of a pass for not being entirely up to snuff with the social rules, but knowing some Swedish will help you.

i actually speak Swedish fluently, it is my first language, so it is not really the issue. it is more about figuring out how to approach people without feeling like i am bothering them or coming across as annoying, and finding new ways to start those interactions.

cool idea! :-)

that is wholesome! i do not think i have the time right now to care for a dog as wholeheartedly as it deserves. but i like the idea of that :-P

wow, this is really nice. thanks! :-)

why do you think they dropped the Presto Engine?

can you ellaborate on "Chrome à la Chinese consortium"?

what browser do you use? and why?

The question is actually "Is Chrome, or anything that's based on it, a valid choice?" and the answer is "no."

yes! and this is what i am interested in. why is the answer "no.", please try to convince me in more detail. i am not interested in "no.", but why is your answer "no"? :-)

Tab islands just encourages people to have too many tabs open.

i think they exist because people already open tons of tabs. instead of encouraging overload this helps manage it by grouping related pages into clusters. that is actually useful in my opinion. you can see this feature making it into other browsers as well, like firefox, for example.

who wants to chat with Opera AI when you can chat with so many other AI? I think in 2026 the only way to communicate that your product is different is to reject AI.

i do not like this aspect myself, but all browsers make use of AI to some extent. don't you think this might be a way to survive the competitive browser market?

Free VPN? Aren't those all scams?

some definitely are, yes, i agree. but i would argue opera's VPN is a browser level privacy tool, it is not meant to replace a full security VPN. i would guess it is mainly used to hide your IP address for websites. does it not do that? you should not view it as a hardcore anonymity solution, i do not think.

---

these are not the technically accurate arguments i was looking for, your arguments are true for many browsers.

opera includes several built-in native features that chrome does not offer by default, doesn't that make it a valid choice to use it instead of chrome?

NO!

oh, sorry for misunderstanding then.

NOOOO! NO NO NO!! It's ALREADY BREACHED!

i see and hear your point. it just makes me sad to think about security in this way, even though i think it would be good for someone that operates in the cyber security sphere. i think a more healthy way of approaching this for the general person, is what the person above said: "[...] what you're practically shooting for is to make the cost higher than the value an attacker would get from breaching you.", or for you not to lose more money/resources/value/whatever by securing your system, than you would do by getting breached or attacked. but that is just my opinion, and i am not an expert, so!

:o)

i completely agree with you. i say the same thing back:

"This."

thanks! valid!

haha. :-)

Don't do anything secret on the computer

i think that might be unavoidable.

Assume every system on Earth is breached

you probably say this jokingly, but this is not a bad take. or rather, "assume every system on earth can/will be breached". that is a good motivation to improve the security for your system, if you have the resources to.

:o)

cool!

I avoid software that I know to be problematic. Also, I firewall off all outgoing network traffic by default, and whitelist very sparingly.

how do you stay informed about what software is problematic? what are examples of addresses you whitelist? if you feel comfortable sharing.

For my smartphone, I run a bare minimum of apps and refuse to install new ones without an extremely good reason. I also pipe all smartphone data through a VPN I run at home, specifically so that I can run it through my firewall and make the block-by-default policy I mentioned above cover the phone as well.

what would be an example of "an extremely good reason"? what VPN solution do you have?

:o)

Asking the question "Are ISPs evil" isn't useful. Asking "What motivates ISPs?" is.

i agree with this statement, but i still think i want answers to both of these questions. while the latter question has a real answer that is easier to reason about and makes it easier to arrive at a conclusion that people generally agree on, i think what i am really looking for is a debate/discussion between educated people. i have no idea how to spark something like that, and this was my attempt to do so. obviously not everyone thinks ISPs are evil, and that is what interests me. why do some people think they are and what motivations lead them to that belief?

But, I'm going to assume you really do mean ISPs.

yes -- correct!

The answer

insightful take. i like your answer. would you say that running an ISP is similar to running any other company? why do you think an ISP that offers exceptional service at remarkably low rates would eventually fail or run out of funds? if such a company gets acquired by another firm and its focus shifts back to profit, would you say that its motivation was not profit before it was acquired?

:o)

https://tavro.se is my ever-changing personal website :-)

Good point.

I agree that flirting doesn’t automatically mean intent or exclusivity. Do you see flirting more as a personality trait than a signal of interest?

Interesting statement, you might be right. Do you think that is always the case? That flirting is self-centered? I know I have flirted with people specifically to make them feel better, not myself. :-)

I am sharing a short, anonymous Google Form to collect perspectives on a situation.

In my case, you develop feelings for someone who is already in a relationship. You know they have a partner. They openly flirt with you, sometimes in front of friends. No lines are clearly drawn, but there is emotional tension.

This is not about drama or justifying bad behavior. I am fully aware this is public, and I am intentionally framing it as something meant to help others, not to validate myself or attack anyone involved.

I am interested in how people think about boundaries and responsibility in these gray areas.

I will publish an anonymized summary on tavro.se/blog.html of responses if there is enough interest. Thoughtful answers appreciated!

Feel free to mail hello@tavro.se if you have any questions...

i'm a junior developer with just about a year of experience in C, so i wouldn't call myself a professional by any means. this is also my first attempt at building a browser engine from scratch and without any prior experience in browser development (aside from some high level insights shared by my colleagues).

this is purely a hobby project aimed at learning. i know i would want something like this when getting started. if i've said anything incorrect or misguided, please feel free to point it out, so i can resolve it. i'm here to learn.

it's also my first time posting on hackernews with my personal account and the first GitHub project i'm sharing publicly like this. please be kind! :'-)