Not OP, but I would love to share some: I relate strongly to the anxiety induced descriptions in OPs text and thus try to avoid these when I interview devs as an engineering manager. Of all the candidates I have interviewed over the years I have never done a live coding interview because it is essentially worthless for me as an interviewer and only serves to discards potentially very clever people whose thought process does not work this way.
Instead I try to find an isolated problem/task we have in our backlog that the candidate should try to implement on their own time, so I can review what kind of solution they will actually deliver once hired. We then go through the solution with them and do a code review as they would go through if they got hired. You then see both the problem-solving skills as well as how they take feedback.
I would recommend checking out DuckDuckGo's excellent "How we hire" guide[0] which describes some of the best hiring process I have come across (albeit it may be too extensive to do in full for some companies).