I will keep recommending Hillel Wayne's crossover project whenever this "Software engineering vs 'real' engineering" discussion pops up.
https://www.hillelwayne.com/tags/crossover-project/
I'm disappointed and jaded by the state of our craft like you. But I'm also very suspicious of claims that other disciplines are somehow these much more earnest, pristine, derived-from-first-principles things. It just doesn't fit my view of human nature.