Here is CSW's original claim that Bitcoin is Turing complete that took many by surprise including Nick Szabo. They heard it as you did, specifically addressing Bitcoin Script.
He immediately corrects them:
"The difference is that the SCRIPT ITSELF ISN'T, what you can do is..."
So there you go. Clearly not what you're claiming here, and if he said anything similar casually I'm sure this is exactly what he means, as he has stated many times, as the article states, as others have stated, as I understand it, and as can be observed.
https://youtu.be/LdvQTwjVmrE?t=1083
I'm glad to hear you never post under other accounts.