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therm0

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If you’re willing to move to a flyover state you could probably reach out to recruiters in the morning and have an offer in hand by lunch. Even the hybrid openings in the midwest/south are bait-and-switch and will be fully onsite soon.

Alternatively there are a lot of positions open at national labs which are onsite, and many work on interesting problems.

Company signals egregious changes in pricing/product strategy. Community backlash happens. Company claws back to a slightly more "reasonable" point that still has a level of negative consumer impact that is higher than the historic model.

Is there a reason this leap forward/tip-toe backward tactic has become more prevalent in recent years? It's so painfully transparent that you can almost time the "we're sorry, please join our fireside chat" announcement to the minute.

What I think in-office advocates miss -- You can still do all of these things with _actual_ friends and family who will be around after you get shitcanned, laid off, whatever.

The unfortunate reality is that the discourse around the remote vs. ass-in-seat style of work must be all or nothing. Some workplaces take a hybrid approach, but they often don't have a mix of 100% in-person and 100% remote employees. You're usually in the office 80% of the time with the allowance of a day at home. So complaints like yours get heard by middle management types and they use them to justify the "welcome back to the office" bullshit. It is worlds easier to live my life when I don't have a two hour commute and when I have the ability to get mundane responsibilities fulfilled on my breaks, and when I don't have to rely on others to take care of my pets and family. When your need to pursue an ephemeral relationship with your coworkers becomes an imposition on my need to nurture the people I love, that's a serious problem and I'm not going to politely respect your "preferences".

Go play ping-pong with your friends.

There's been times where I've spent weeks or even months going down a path that has ultimately proven fruitless, including spending really long hours on it. That certainly counts as work, but if it results in no meaningful value being produced, then what's the point?

how do you do this and not get fired? i got a lecture earlier this year about how spending two weeks on a difficult problem in a project that i'd just gotten dropped into was not befitting of a senior software developer.

save more money, work on your skill set, and mind your health a little better than you did in your 20s.

other than that, just do the things you want to do. yeah maybe some doors have closed on your athletic abilities but besides that there's no sense in doing Y thing you're not interested in just because you're X years old and other X year olds are doing Y thing.

There are plenty of problems that are unique to men, whether that fits your narrative or not. Vastly higher suicide rates, vastly higher workplace deaths, widespread infant male genital mutilation even in developed countries, selective service, court bias (criminal, divorce, and custody), lower life expectancy, vastly higher war casualty rates. Is it really that upsetting to you for these issues to take the spotlight in the context of masculinity for one day a year?

By the way, most of those groups you listed already have awareness days.

first, i'm sorry to hear about your dad. that's really rough but i'm glad you'll get to spend a few months with him to say goodbye.

second, i'd probably spend all my time writing hundreds of letters to my family and friends for future holidays, birthdays, etc. lots of conditional letters like "don't open until you [get married, have your first child, get a new job, feel hopeless]".

most of us don't get to leave that great an impact on our planet during the short time that we have here but having your thoughts and compassion available to your loved ones when it's needed--even when you're gone--will reverberate through time.

of all "spiritual" beliefs, eternal recurrence seems to make the most sense to me. not in the hindu sense, but the idea that that an infinite number of universes could occur and that the matter that makes up your consciousness could configure itself again to give you the experience of living and sense of self that you have now doesn't seem that far fetched.

This nonsense talk about civil war has gotten ridiculous. What is going to be the impetus for this war? Who are the belligerents? The "law and order" party has a monopoly on gun ownership and our police force is militarized. I guess there may be riots and civil unrest but the idea that we're going to witness a "civil war" is just silly.