monkeyboykin

I was addicted to weed from ages 15-23. I have clinical depression and anxiety/OCD (now medicated and stable). I basically isolated and got stuck in a loop of believing I was broken and a bad person. When I committed to quitting I joined addiction recovery groups and asked for help instead of trying to do it alone. I still rely on the wisdom I gained in AA/MA. Trust God, clean house, help others, go do something when you are in danger of wallowing in self pity. 4 years later, I have a few real friends and many acquaintances. I swing dance and volunteer. I work in a semi-social office. Life is good. I still get paranoid thoughts, but they don't own or define me. I wish the best to all the lonely programmers and alienated people out there.

I feel similar sentiments about working in Cloud. It's mostly vaporware.

And tech elites have nothing better to do in free time

This is it exactly. Programmers believe that we are God's special autists. 'Neurodivergent' is a nonfalsifiable label just like 'queer'

These AI bros are getting too high sniffing their own farts. They need to do a tour of duty doing actual manufacturing automation work.

My profession, and, frankly, my identity, puts me on a computer all day and thus adjacent to my digital addictions.

It would require super-human sustained restraint to abstain from dopamine treats when on the computer all day. Have you considered spending less time at the machine?

After 5 years working remote I had similar concerns and started feeling alienated from myself and other people.

My solution was to pivot to industrial automation. I get to code, but also work with other people, cool robots, and visit factories. Some of them are loud and dirty but some are super interesting. I feel a lot healthier now. I am an introverted and hyperliterate person, but the lifestyle where I was 'locked in' to digital hyperreality all day was too much.

I tried all the coping skills to preserve my sanity while continuing to earn a Cloud Capital salary. None of them solved the problem of feeling like I was timesharing my own mind to the Machine, until I gave up trying to have it both ways. I wish you the best.