We deleted the production database by accident 6 years ago
Exactly right.
The "comfort" will come from taking responsibility and owning and correcting the problem such that you have confidence it won't happen again.
Platitudes to make someone feel better without action helps nobody.
The fear is a valuable feedback mechanism and shouldn't been ignored. It's there to remind you of the potential consequences of a careless fuckup.
Lots here misunderstood this I think.. clearly the point is not to berate people for making mistakes or to foster a "fear culture" insofar as fear of personal attack but rather to not ignore the internal/personal fear of fucking up because you give a shit.