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cmvf51

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Being deaf 14 years ago

Thank you for sharing that post and having the courage to express your feelings. I could never understand what it must be like to be deaf. But being gay, and a mid-20's software developer, I felt many of the same feelings you described reading your post.

It took me many years after college to finally work for a company where there was another developer who was gay and also happened to be my age. We never worked together on projects, but did talk after-work sometimes, just knowing that I wasn't some sort of anomaly was reassuring in many ways.

Like Deaf pride, I don't identify with Gay pride either. Being a shy person to begin with, I have no desire to call more attention to myself. My friends and family know, but I never worked out how to ever share that with co-workers. Unfortunately as a result people assume I'm straight. In a male-dominated work environment, that can be extremely isolating, even hurtful when the inevitable gay-bashing lunch conversation comes up, those are moments where I would gladly borrow your deafness.

Over the years, it becomes a lot easier as I learned to reconcile my feelings, and I figure it'll get easier when I meet someone special enough to frame in a picture, and put on my desk at work. Just like you will.