changexd

I guess I'm somewhat worried about not being able to get back to tech again, but I just realized I can still do open source contribution if I want to when doing WH.

I'm in a weird state that I have an okay amount of saving for me to do this, but I'm still worried because I had been through having almost zero money and two years of unemployment, I'm scared to get back to that again.

In the end, I know I have to let this thing go or I'll never become happy even if I'm making tons of money, gotta enjoy life sometimes, thanks for the words!

Best of luck in our journeys too!

I'm 27 and have a bit of saving, I just checked wwoof and it seems pretty cool, I couldn't make up my mind which city I should go and WWOOFing gives me a general idea of the work demands, I'll hit you up sometimes, thank you for the sharing!

thanks for the story, one of the reasons I want to do this is to let go of control and to believe in myself so I can face unpredictable future, I will never know if future will get better or not, but I'll definitely be mentally stronger when I do this, cheers!

My pursuit of happiness, I'm in fear of quitting my current job and go for a working holiday to Australia, I'm excited while still trying to overcome the fear of not having a stable and well paying job because I don't find any joy in this job no more , so I am working on mentally getting out of this, I want to truly let go "money is more important than my happiness" idea.

a very good language this seems to me like

Social skills and mental health!, I've been working pretty hard on learning how to make friends, showing my admiration to girls and become generally an outgoing and honest person, I used to be somewhat afraid of talking to strangers because I was quite worried that people might hurt me, and now I'm feeling more comfortable having conversation with new friends with less trust issues, though I pushed myself a bit too hard to recently I got plenty of panic attacks, I know it's a phase, so I'll keep working on it!

Great work! I'm usually bored too, sometimes I find something to study or try to implement known tech, but only give up when I feel like it's too hard for me or it's too much work haha, this motivates me a bit.

People usually do this for validation or just the fact is the opposite, often times these kind of people couldn't get partners just because they have this "I'm top __% guy so my partner should be ___" mentality and keeps complaining.

Merry Christmas homies! We don't really celebrate Christmas in my country but I would still like to wish you all a great holiday! much love <3

I used to be like this! then I figured out the reason what makes making new friends hard, I became more relaxed hanging out and reaching out to new friends, now I can enjoy both new and old friends' accompany, tho I'm still working on making myself more comfortable making friends.

glicol is super super cool, thanks for sharing!

I used to be defensive a lot, that's when I realized one of the main reason was due to low self-esteem and lack of self acceptance, many times people weren't trying to devalue me or offend me but because of I couldn't really accept myself, I usually thought they were attacking me instead of actually engage in the conversation to see if they really meant to judge me.

After therapy, lots of reading and learning to accept myself, now I feel better and more efficient communicating, sometimes I don't even notice people are judging me or making fun of me, because now I seek very little validation from people, this makes me focus on the issue and supporting kind people around me.

it's still a work in progress, but this new perspective of the world brings me more freedom and happiness.

this is a very good read, and I did found some of the mistakes I sometimes make in communication, this is one of the post that'll make me want to reread in the future.

I think this post is your first step, so kudos to this!, I think philosophy books help, you can read some basic philosophy, pause and write down what you think, instead of internal voice, you can make texts as a bridge between your thoughts and yourself.

Have you been checked for ADHD? I think this is a common problem for people who has ADHD, I got diagnosed in college, that's when I realized normal people don't have that much thoughts usually.

Very interesting and fun read! thanks for the post, when I saw the public restful api endpoint I immediately tried to see if I can make request just to see the "NICE TRY!" message, haha, then I kept on reading how you managed this issue.

I know that my colleague runs proxmox on this, you can do many things with it, my company is currently running proxmox and set up many vms as kubernetes nodes, I always appreciate people who set up their own lab, that colleague of mine somehow has enterprise grade storage server, nics... and many more inside his house just to have fun

I really want to try factorio, but now I usually see games as non-productive activity (that's my problem and I know it, in my defense, I've already spent way too much time gaming in college and did nothing), I wonder if factorio can make my software skill better in terms of designing and critical thinking, if that's the case, I would love to have fun and practice as well

Thanks for the writeup, very interesting and detailed! and the effort of digging through the browser code to find all this is fantastic!

It always fascinates me how people can do this!! Would there be any write ups about how this was made, I'd really appreciate this.

I feel this so bad, I used to make little software that solves my problem, now whenever I want to build anything I think about "is it going to be useful for my resume?" instead of fun things and I always quit because it then put lots of pressure on me for building "useful but not fun" projects.

I think comparing to other system vulnerability such as "if you make X library do Y thing(...10 more steps skipped), you can do RCE", this is fairly understandable for me, at least I know how it works, i guess this also means this exploit can be easily accessed?

thank you for the repo, I've been wanting to learn haskell but I didn't really know what can I build with, i might as well build some similar things like this since I've been trying to make my own blog server, now i get a chance to learn haskell and finally get up and build this.

In such case, I'll talk to my fiance about the situation to see if there's any thing we can do, if this person really loves you and support you, I'm sure you'll figure things out, you want a person that wish you happy, or else things will prolly only get worse even after marriage and kids, worst case, you'll trade your years happiness in a burned out state for this "future" you rely on.

One thing I realized recently is "don't put yourself in a bad state just because you have EXPECTATIONS for future", because if the future is not what you expect, you'll find yourself regretting every bit of your action, and to keep this expected future alive, you'll push yourself too hard.

I really wish you the best.

Appreciate the work! I didn't find the value of reading until I broke up with my ex which had me rethinking about my whole life and value, that's how I found the value of reading, right now I read when commuting and sometimes I just don't know what to read next, this is a good place to find some good books, thanks!

Well in this case my friend, perhaps sometimes it's okay to go back home? I have lots of friends doing this to them, they are burned out both physically and mentally, people usually have options if they can step back a bit, do you really want to sacrifice your happiness for working abroad and become "successful"? Only you can drag yourself out as you've mentioned your therapist's solutions do not work for you, it's okay to take a break, giving it up is not giving up, but a reason to look different path, you can be truly be free only if you let yourself free.

Have you considered going out and meeting real people?

[i] am still not going to use Elasticsearch [For Free?] again?

Petition to make all the official blog post written like this, I love the rap songs reference

At first I was super weirded out by these questions, but I do think these are good convo starter but the delivery must be less straightforward, instead of directly asking these questions, I would rather start from something small then see if anything that can lead me to getting to know better about people, actually listen and respond is the key i suppose

edit: nvm I changed my mind, I think "intentionally starting a conversation" is somewhat unnatural, If I'm actually curious about a person, the conversation will start naturally

Thank you for this post, I though I was alone in this, I used to love study and learning during my free time, but recently I feel the same as you do, I sort of feel like I "need" to come up or code some project, but I really don't know what to do and what do I "want" to do, that's when I realized that I probably need to take a break for now during weekends, so I went out trying some other stuff, maybe one day I'll find something meaningful enough to me that makes me wanna code again, maybe not, either way it's okay, and I still try my best for my job, that's all it matters, hope you find a way to deal with this, cheers!