Perignon

Java applets? 2005 called, they want their hackernews posts back.

Name still sucks and is disgusting af.

I'll bite. Why do I need this?

Why? Why choose Swift over a language with an established framework ala python, ruby, ASP.NET, Node.js ?

Dick & Daughters or Ismael ANUS are definitely not more vile then Cockroach. The former are names rooted in tradition, not some idea of a an arrogant hipster joke. To call a company Cockroach is fucken arrogance. Plain and Simple.

It's not bikeshedding. Who the fuck wants to work for a company called Cockroach Labs? Seriously, sure your tech friends and recruiters might appreciate it on your resume but anyone outside of tech? Applying for an apartment, mortgage, car, lol good luck. And also not too sure that anyone outside the immediate tech/startup nerd scene would appreciate it other.

That aside why the hell do I want to thing of cockroaches day in and day out when I am using their product? Seriously, is this someone's idea of a bad joke?

The name has got to go.

Agree, the name is pretty off putting. Maybe they were trying to be funny? I don't know, but I would recommend changing it.