Hacking and addiction

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7935233

by mathandheroin • 12 years ago

28 26 12 years ago

news.ycombinator.com

I have lurked here for a while. I am an engineer that struggles with opiate/opioid addiction. I am curious to know, do you struggle with addiction and have a technology related role at a company?

What is your drug of choice?

rthomas62• 12 years ago

I had quite a caffeine addiction but I recently kicked it. I was up to 900 mg/day at my peak. I think caffeine counts as an addiction. I had a strong dependency on it and couldn't function physically or mentally without it.

deadfall• 12 years ago

Caffeine is toxic, even though some say it can only kill humans if you drink one cup of coffee for each pound you weigh. The body evacuates this in many ways though. Some say it really doesn't have any extreme health disadvantages. Some even say it could help prevent some diseases such as cardiovascular disease. I try to only drink coffee or tea once every two days in fear of addiction, unless some project is due.

dllthomas2• 12 years ago

I definitely try to step down my caffeine when I can. Makes it more effective when I need it.

mathandheroin3• 12 years ago

Yeah you know I actually have had panic attacks from too much caffeine. Moderation is definitely key.

jqm• 12 years ago

I find caffeine really doesn't help all that much although I do generally drink a partial cup of coffee or a diet soda sometime in the morning.

Too much and I get strung out and too wired to work efficiently. And.... it makes me tired not long afterwords. A little tiny bit in one or two doses a day isn't bad but much more and it becomes counterproductive.

My favorite drugs? A good light meal, fresh air and a nice long walk in the sunshine.

NAFV_P• 12 years ago

I was up to 900 mg/day at my peak.

How many cups would that equate to?

Jackmc1047• 12 years ago

I think it's about 70mg per cup.

rthomas62• 12 years ago

3 16 oz mugs of drip coffee, which equates to 6 standard 8 oz cups. I was assuming 150 mg/cup, which is about average for drip coffee.

mathandheroin3• 12 years ago

That definitely counts as an addiction.

If it affects you in a negative way and you cant stop, that is addiction.

silenthax0r• 12 years ago

ketamine is my escape :(

dllthomas2• 12 years ago

Hacker News.

mathandheroin3• 12 years ago

Thanks for replying guys. I have been struggling with my self-created loneliness lately.

It is so weird that people dont want to hang out with a using drug addict. Haha.

Anyhow, I like to program in Lisp, perl and python. I work at a startup and no one knows I use and I never nod at work. I have been promoted twice since I have been there so I still have it together at work and it is going well.

Thanks for the responses. It makes me feel less isolated aand alone which feels really good right now :)

kagro• 12 years ago

Yes I'm addicted to heroin. I have a much easier time than my junkie friends with a programmer's salary but its not a life anyone would want.

mathandheroin22• 12 years ago

Yeah, I am lucky in that I do not have many friends and no one knows that I use. The salary definitely makes it easier to support a habit.

Have you ever gone into work sick?

aurelien• 12 years ago

I have no addiction and no job, is that link?

trylobeet• 12 years ago

i often do. have a techy job, that is. far as the junkyism that's a constant. been 10+ years now, used ibogaine once to kick - that lasted, but then i realized i'm better off on it than off it. where i am at right now we got a morphine maintenance program along with the methadone. readily shootable, and just as readily esterifiable. use propionyl chloride to get the propyl ester, which is... potent enough. :)

talles• 12 years ago

I wonder if anyone uses drugs to enhance working (to gain productivity) rather than to relieve the stress...

Like people who take Ritalin for studying

sux0r2• 12 years ago

A fair number of medical residents (doctors who are still training) take stimulants to stay awake/sharp

mathandheroin22• 12 years ago

I used to take modafinil.

tkwidmer• 12 years ago

an ex of mine had a prescription for that stuff. Super intense.

sux0r2• 12 years ago

Pot (fairly high doses). Never at work. Gray area as to whether or not it's a problem but have a hard time not using. Don't want to admit to myself that it could be a problem. Extremely secretive about it. Sometimes still enjoy it.

rwhitman• 12 years ago

One of my best friends is a brilliant internationally notable figure in his field and has a serious cocaine problem. To the point where its destroyed his life and left him jobless and homeless at least once. He burned all his income on drugs, lost his job, ended up not being to afford rent, put his place on Airbnb year round and then couch surfed while borrowing money for food and drugs.

When I lived in LA I knew a few high-functioning heroin addicts. It gets the better of everyone eventually. The fact that you can go about your day-to-day and none of your acquaintances pick up on it can be reinforcement to go further, test the limits.

If you have a well paying engineering job you have the money to get yourself to a good doctor. Just saying.

nittr• 12 years ago

A joint does it for me, but then i get these uncontrollable munchies.

mamaki• 12 years ago

mary jane ftw

j-m• 12 years ago

I'm an engineer, and I had an extremely bad stimulant problem (amphetamine when I could get my hands on it, methamphetamine when I couldn't). It came pretty close to wrecking my life, but I got over it.

Don't take this the wrong way if you're reluctant to deal with the problem right now (before I got serious about quitting I hated it when people lectured me about this stuff), but here's what got me clean. It's really hard, but it's possible and I wish I had done it much earlier.

For me it took a stint in rehab (30 days), which I strongly recommend if your job will allow it. While it's certainly possible that owning up to your problem at work will cost you your job, HR folks usually have training and experience with employees with substance abuse problems, and if you're at all valued as an employee, they'll usually give you a chance to get your shit together. Most people have a sense that rehab is kind of shitty, but to be honest, I had a blast. Basically summer camp with group therapy.

Whether or not you're able to do rehab, you should absolutely check out Narcotics Anonymous. NA meetings are not all created equal, and some are really bad -- dealers showing up, no one really staying clean, that kind of thing. Shop around before you give up on it. I was pretty turned off by all the God talk, especially since I'm pretty sure that I couldn't actually get myself to believe in anything like that, but nobody shoves it down your throat, and in my own experience it works perfectly well whether you believe in God or not. It's mostly about social support.

Ninja edit: I don't have any personal experience with opiate withdrawal, but I've heard really good things from a lot of ex-junkies about Suboxone. It's not a magic bullet, but it's a fuck of a lot easier than being dope sick for a week.

Hacking and addiction

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