Why I don't have a girlfriend: An application of the Drake Equation to love [pdf]

https://www.astro.sunysb.edu/fwalter/AST248/why_i_dont_have_a_girlfriend.pdf

by kerim-ca • 15 days ago

3 2 15 days ago

astro.sunysb.edu

scottmas• 15 days ago

Mate, you’ve fallen into a mind trap. It’s not true!

I know because I was in it once doing your exact same calculations and was out of my mind lonely and stuck. You gotta find a way to believe in “average” and get out of the perfectionist trap. And in retrospect, all my rumination was just pure rumination and self imposed dumb expectations that had no backing in actual reality and what makes a happy marriage and life.

You gotta dare to hope and dare to believe that “settling” is just an idiotic story we tell ourselves after years of psychological programming from movies and pop culture. Every human you will ever meet has infinite worlds within themselves. The only job to be done in dating is finding someone whose inner infinite world you find interesting enough and who finds your inner world interesting enough too.

:end_soap_box:

Rooting for you mate.

stevenalowe• 15 days ago

Or perhaps you don’t have a girlfriend because you spend time making lists of qualifications and over-analyzing things that don’t matter instead of putting yourself out there and seeing what happens. Let go of your fantasy expectations, you don’t get to design/specify whom you love.

Why I don't have a girlfriend: An application of the Drake Equation to love [pdf]

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