The True Self Is the Person You Want Others to Believe You Are

https://robkhenderson.substack.com/p/the-true-self-is-the-person-you-want

by paulpauper • 4 years ago

1 2 4 years ago

robkhenderson.substack.com

hirundo• 4 years ago

This is a bizarre misuse of language. True, as in conforming with reality, is what is rather than what is believed to be. Therefore the true self is the self that is rather than the one you want others to believe in. Henderson's "true self" is actually a better definition of the "aspirational self", which in most people is much different from actuality.

And to consider the "aspirational" self to be the "authentic" self is compounding the error. You are authentic when you act normally, not when you take on the role of some other person of your dreams.

The true self is closer to the person you are when you think nobody is watching.

thekiptxt• 4 years ago

When caught doing something they’re ashamed of, people say things like, “That’s not who I am” or “That wasn’t really me.” They are implying that reputation-damaging acts are not reflective of their true self. This doesn’t mean they are lying: Many people really believe their shameful acts are not reflective of who they are deep down.

To be charitable, TFA is loosely using truth in the sense of “not intentionally lying,” which is somewhat common. But yeah, just because actions align with my mental model of self isn’t an indication that the model is accurate from the perspective of a third party, which is obviously the more important consideration.

I’m kind of sick of these shock value statements which then recover to something sensible by bending words beyond the breaking point.

The True Self Is the Person You Want Others to Believe You Are

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